Take the city bus out to the bars; it's cheap and standing room only. Don't forget to bring some cash for a cab for those days when you forget your ID, or afterwards, when it's snowing too hard to walk home and the buses have stopped (12:15 am!)

The Ranch bus (for $2) or the Magic bus (for free) can also help you out. They're better choices in that they don't turn into pumpkins at midnight, but they don't come as often as the city buses do, so you have to be slightly more punctual. For more info, try buses.

Another option, if you're feeling wealthy tonight. Or if one of your friends is too drunk to stand up. Take a cab with your mealcard: Red Top Taxi, 821-1700.

Whatever you do, don't drink and drive. You're probably laughing because you don't have a car and could afford a car as easily as you could afford your own personal amusement park, but seriously.
And especially don't drink and then try to ride your bike. It sounds funny until you run over your own leg, or hit a pedestrian, or just fall off and give yourself a few black eyes on the curb. (I'm told rollerblading is also a bad plan.) Take another method of transportation, or get yourself arrested and let the cops drive you around.